You first have to understand that a lifestyle is not a group sport
A lifestyle is what you do when your not living the rest of your own lives
Your everyday lives
And having someone to share your life with is a plus
These lifestyles are not selfish sports
Even if many treat them like it
That don't mean that they are doing anything more than faking it too
But who wants admit that their life is not complete enough without someone to share it with and enjoy the experience together?
How many of you people who claim these sexual lifestyles
Even respect that all of these lifestyles are of a sexual nature
And the only one you have to fuck is your mate or provider
So
How come so many people are just fucking around with these lifestyles?
And bitching about how fucked up it is sealing the deal?
These lifestyles are relationship based lifestyles
If you can not productively survive a relationship together?
Then everything else is just bullshit waiting to happen
Maybe I am a bit more blessed than a few others
Maybe I'm just from a different world
Maybe THAT is my style
Maybe it's my faith
But as I look around these lifestyle groups
Full of adults
Freaks who want to become more than just a freak
Others who just want to be somebody they wish they could be
I wonder how so many people have the nerve to judge others
Just by what they think they read and see
On others personal profile pages and journals
And everybody wants to be a big shot
Everybody wants to believe in some shit that aint real
Until you are living it
To the fullest
But people got this lifestyle shit twisted!
They really think that just because you are kinda kinky
That you need to be king and queen of fuckin kink
The act like they need to save the world
They claim that they are put on this earth to better
These lifestyles
By acting like this shit is some public shit
By acting like THEY need to protect others from their own lives
By acting like these lifestyles are important
And lawd knows most of them are not ready to deal with most of the realities that these lifestyles create
You can't do shit by your self but masterbate
And sex is a act more powerful than drugs
And we got stupid addicts running around the net
Like they care about anything more than not being alone
As much or as less as so many others seem to be
They even change their names to
Dominant and submissive or switch
They change their mentality to
Owned or unowned
They change their directions to
Lifestyle community or loneliness
They act like knowing ANYTHING about these lifestyles
Is gonna change what they are or not
They act like knowing what they went though is a badge of honor
But they only know what not to do
You see post on how to find the worst kind of person
Who seeks weakness for their own manipulation
And they scare the shit out of others
Just to warn them of their own fears
You see people hate on others for claiming to be interested in something they too think they are into in the same manner enough for them to protect the integrity of these lifestyles in general
As if these lifestyles need defense from negative images
People even act as if when they sign off line
They go out and live for nothing but these lifestyles
They act like everybody has kink on the brain every second of the day
And worst of all
These people think that these lifestyles can be defined
And people get up in their feelings
When they see someone who seems fake to them
And some even go further
Thinking they need to defend what they feel to be right or wrong about how others live their lives
Without ever meeting anyone
So lets first figure out what is missing from this
"Shituation"
The reason why so many people have such a fucked up time
Attempting to become a productive lifestyle member
May be
Because they don't even know what it takes to first have a productive life enough to get deeper into these sexual lifestyles with anyone respectfully
You can not add style to a life you are not ready to invest more of your life in with anyone else
And it first takes having more control over your own lives
The term lifestyle was originally coined by Austrian psychologist Alfred Adler in 1929.
The current broader sense of the word dates from 1961.
In sociology, a lifestyle is the way a person lives. A lifestyle is a characteristic bundle of behaviors that makes sense to both others and oneself in a given time and place, including social relations, consumption, entertainment, and dress.
The behaviors and practices within lifestyles are a mixture of habits, conventional ways of doing things, and reasoned actions.
A lifestyle typically also reflects an individual's attitudes, values or worldview.
Therefore, a lifestyle is a means of forging a sense of self and to create cultural symbols that resonate with personal identity.
Not all aspects of a lifestyle are entirely voluntaristic. Surrounding social and technical systems can constrain the lifestyle choices available to the individual and the symbols she/he is able to project to others and the self.
The lines between personal identity and the everyday doings that signal a particular lifestyle become blurred in modern society . For example, "green lifestyle" means holding beliefs and engaging in activities that consume fewer resources and produce less harmful waste (i.e. a smaller carbon footprint), and deriving a sense of self from holding these beliefs and engaging in these activities.
Some commentators argue that, in Modernity, the cornerstone of lifestyle construction is consumption behavior, which offers the possibility to create and further individualize the self with different products or services that signal different ways of life.
So what others have now defined as a lifestyle
Is really undefined
If done correctly
But to hear so many others tell it?
There is ONLY a few ways that EVERYONE has to choose
How they can live
And call what they do a part of this lifestyle that so many others claim to be a part of
And that's bullshit!
As I see it?
A vanilla person or couple who has no knowledge of these lifestyles
Has a better chance of getting it right in time
Over so many others who keep acting like this shit is so hard to get into without killing each other
And yes, people do fuck up
People do abuse these lifestyles for personal gain
People do wish to be a part of the "in crowd"
Even in these online communities
Politics
The term lifestyle in politics can often be used in conveying the idea that society be accepting of a variety of different ways of life---from the perspective that differences among ways of living are superficial, rather than existential. Lifestyle is also sometimes used pejoratively, to mark out some ways of living as elective or voluntary as opposed to others that are considered mainstream, unremarkable, or normative.
Within anarchism, lifestylism is the view that an anarchist society can be formed by changing one's own personal activities rather than by engaging in class struggle.
And yet, the people who scream the loudest about what these lifestyles mean to them?
Are the worst ones at doing a damn thing more than grouping up with anyone who is going in the same direction
And have the nerve to judge others on how they do what they do
And call it what everyone else wants to claim is
And after having met many people in real time
In these lifestyles
Euphemism
"The lifestyle" is term commonly used in both BDSM and swinging.
I'm not impressed
Because they are so busy judging others
That few notice that they aint doing shit!
But they seem to have permission to fuck with everyone else they see who is doing nothing more than their own thang!
Aint that some shit?
How can so many single people
And people who are not so single but they claim to have freedom
To fuck with others who are looking for some new freaky and kinky shit to do with their spare time
And most of this shit is just sexual acts
Or almost sexual acts
And yet
These people can not respect open sexuality as a whole
Not people they don't think they like the images and actions they have exposure too
And THAT is the real issue here
Too many people have too much exposure to others lives
And they don't know shit about anything more than what they have lived to know about their own personal shit
And what scares me is the amount of people who loose their own identity for the need of being called a Dom or sub
Or whatever
But we got people who got beef with others because of how they write and what they think they can judge from what they get from what they read or hear n the rumor mill
And you wonder why so many people get mad because they can't find someone online?
Maybe it's because your ass don't need to be looking for shit!
Maybe your ass don't get why these lifestyles are really made for
Maybe it's because you have no control over your own realities
Maybe too many people are too busy looking for shit to get into with others they think should pay them some attention
And their own shit aint ready to deal with the deeper shit in life that comes with these lifestyles
In real time
With at least a mate you have enough faith in to explore these lifestyles with
But to call what we do a lifestyle by so many is as fake as they claim others seem to be
Lifestyle anarchism is a term derived from Murray Bookchin's polemical essay "Social Anarchism Or Lifestyle Anarchism: An Unbridgeable Chasm." He used it to criticise those anarchists who he believed advocated individualism at the expense of class struggle. The term is sometimes used by anarchists as a description of positions that concentrate on changes to personal behaviour rather than the wholesale reorganisation or abolition of class and hierarchical society, or simply as a synonym for individualist anarchism.
Critics of this term see this definition as a form of sectarianism; anarchist librarian and activist Chuck Munson for example, denies that lifestylism exists, and has decried the concept as "one of the most divisive and destructive things inflicted on the anarchist movement in recent years."
Practical Anarchy has identified the "lifestylist" debate "simplistic" and exhorted anarchists to move on from it.
There is no right way of doing everything in these lifestyles
Unless you are doing them with your mate
And productively growing together
Because of the experiences you learn that each of you enjoy
Together
And playing well with others?
Well, if you can't trust your own damn mate?
Then you don't need to act as if you can handle another one
But it's so easy to sample these lifestyles with any partner
That is willing to get down with you
That is does not matter to many of you at that time
That you are not sure that you will both be able to live with each other and grow from what you know
Together
Because most of you people do not have time
You fear risking your heart, health, and life to someone else
Anyone else
And misery loves so much company
That too many of you take offense to others who don't give a fuck about you
Even if they claim to have some oath of honor
All bets are off on any lonely night
Just for the need of not being lonely that night
So let's get a bit more real about this so called lifestyle shit
I don't know many of you
And most of you damn sure don't have a clue about me
But we all can learn from even the most clueless person
About this lifestyle
If you are looking for something positive in every direction
Most of you are just wasting time at work
Bored and lonely
And always looking at everyone else's lives with Rose colored glasses
Trying to tell everybody else what they are doing wrong
And most of you are doing nothing positive
More than sitting on your ass
Living in others heads and lives rent free
And acting like everybody should follow you
And that is bullshit!
And too many of you have invented a warped since of reality
In what you THINK these lifestyles should be
Just for you
In your own personal life
That few are willing to invest any great amount of time to
Because this shit aint about you
The general understanding of these lifestyles are:
First you get control of your own life
You respect your own personal realities
Then you consider what you have room to share
And then you make room for them in your lives
Then you prepare your self for proving how important they are to you and your life's needs and purpose
Then you take the risk
And you stick to your word and your direction
And you live
Until you find someone who enjoys your company
And then you impress them
And if your lucky
You can then explore these lifestyles
Together
Enjoying the lessons before you
Together
And in time
You may be a shining example of something that looks like
Productive real time partners
Who are driven to respect what these lifestyles have to offer
To couples
Or others who can afford to see the services of a provider
But if your ass aint got no faith in improving your life with someone for the long haul?
Then fucking around for the need of doing something kinky or freaky aint gonna cut it
And it will show
And it is showing on many of the side bar comments and social group gossip of many of the so called "REAL" lifestyle folks
And all the while
Real people who want to explore real time
With real people of like minds and lives that do not conflict with each other
These new people are seeking the same shit that so many others claim they desire
But they are not buying into the bullshit and cliques
That seem to be keeping more people from being impressive for just being unique and worthy
And they are finding others who are willing to walk with them
As they learn how to not only understand what BDSM is
But learn how to make it their own
Together
In time
As they live more connected
Through time
Together
This is not a game to them
This is a addition of style to their lives
And with or without these lifestyles
They have a better chance of enjoying a few kinky acts
Than becoming jaded to the possibilities that they will ever find true love and true lifestyles to live by
As so many of you
Bitch and moan about how fucked up it is wanting something
You are not ready to have
Because your people skills suck
And most of you don't know shit about other people
And that is what these lifestyles are all about
Other people
"Oh yeah, and it's about..."
respect
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